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The Odds

Scott, 2023


What are the odds my parents would divorce, both remarry, and leave my adolescence so miserable I could leave home at 18 and never sleep in my bed again, and never want to?


What are the odds my college advisor, randomly assigned, with whom I would spend 15 minutes total of my life, would recognize, critically, my potential being bigger than my confidence and say "Nope...I'm signing you up for pre-med".


In just these 2 events, there may be 10 pivot points that, had they not occurred exactly as they did and in that order, would have changed the trajectory of my life and I would not be here now, who I understand me to be, writing this, weeping.


There are so many others, some I considered my failures, some not possible except as directed by God, and more I don't even remember.


...that one girl that got engaged over Christmas break or that other unfaithful one


...that Kay called back when I didn't have the courage to give her time to answer


...that my girls' birthmom required "we not be from Memphis, not have other kids, and be highly educated", all that and more (or else)


...and most recently admitting some dots don't connect for me and they probably aren't going to and it makes me better getting that out of the way. They were distractions leaving holes in my soul


All these things have people with pivot points of their own, all also impossibly impossible, connected to mine, mine to theirs.


But they happened, at the right time, in the right order.


What are the odds?

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